It seemed like a good idea at the time

The other day I went to the doctor and a series of tests broke out.

The biggest question turned out to be not whether my heart was healthy, or if I had a heart at all, but if I could survive the shock when I got the bill.

Don’t get me wrong. The health care profession does a lot of good. As a chronic illness survivor, in fact, my urologist has saved my hide more times than I care to share.

What’s more, medical professionals do amazing things in bringing back heart attack victims to the land of the living.

But testing seems to be in vogue today. The health care industry needs to cover all its bases to survive financially a lawsuit-happy society, and so medical pros are extremely thorough.

Maybe you’ve had a similar experience.

This all started when I wanted to establish for myself a family doctor. That way, if I got in serious trouble, my reckoning went, I could get the referrals I would need to specialists.

My new doctor, bless her heart, covered all the bases. She even checked to see if I had symptoms of the cancer that prematurely killed my dad.

In the midst of everything else, she ordered an EKG. The electrocardiogram, among other things, can identify damaged heart muscle and abnormal heart rhythms.

In my case, the EKG showed an anomaly — a possible old heart attack — something I wasn’t told about at the time of the test.

But I was sent for a stress test. This involved about 160 pictures taken of the heart from every possible angle. These pictures also came back with an anomaly — an odd shadow.

Ultimately, I was sent to see a cardiologist. The heart doc said the old attack possibly seen on the EKG was a phantom, and the shadow on the stress test pictures was nothing to fret over.

I have two questions. First, why wasn’t the EKG sent to a cardiologist to read in the first place? Yes, heart doctors are in short supply. But such a step could have saved a lot of time, worry and money.

Second, with due respect to the fine medical personnel serving our community, why does the hospital get all this high-priced, incredibly wonderful equipment and then send poor-quality faxes of heart tests to be read? Seems like a medical mistake waiting to happen.

Shouldn’t these pictures be sent by computer? Or is the hospital worried some evil, twisted soul will hack in and steal personal details, leading to yet another lawsuit for invasion of privacy?

You, too, might have a list of things that seemed like a good idea at the time but in some way went haywire.

Another of mine was attending a charismatic church for the dedication of my girlfriend’s great-niece. The service was New School. Lots of guitar playing, drums and wonderful singing. A friendly atmosphere.

An uplifting sermon.

And then the pastor said, “Independent thinking is the worst taskmaster on planet Earth.”

The good reverend has a right to his opinion. And I have a right to respectfully disagree.

I happen to think going with the flock needs to be questioned. Sure, it’s often the best way to go. But sometimes life needs to be looked at from reverse angles.

Where would life be without independent thinking? Would we have electric light? Automobiles? Turbocharged modems? Fallingwater and other home designs by Frank Lloyd Wright. Other innovations in science and technology?

It also seemed like a good idea at the time to buy myself six extra long T-shirts, the kind that don’t come untucked and can double as pajamas or a tent.

Only problem is, I’m an easily annoyed person, and the extra long T-shirt turns out to be more or less insufferable. Maybe they will make great rags for car or cat washing.

I’d take my car to the car wash, and my cat to the cat wash, but I spent all my dispensable income on heart tests.

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