>La Grande Observer | Union and Wallowa Counties' News Leader

TOUR SURVIVORS: Only the sturdiest ofpassengers, as Colt.45 band members will attest, can withstand the rattle and shaking as the van cruises at a top speed of47 miles per hour. The group will perform for a younger than 21 dance from 9 p.m. to midnight Friday and Saturday at the Elgin Community Center. (Submitted photo).

ELGIN - This Friday and Saturday Colt.45 will attempt another daring feat. Colt Haney, lead singer and lyricist for the band, will drive the crew 34 miles from their home base in Union to Elgin.

This weekend is the Elgin Stampede, and the band will perform for two nights at the Elgin Community Center. The aforementioned daring feat has nothing to do with the performance of classic rock covers and some original work. The challenge centers on getting a large black and white Chevy van from Union to Elgin.

Fans should note that, although the abused 1975 van holds within quality name-brand equipment, as well as talented band members, the van holds nearly no monetary value. Theoretically, one could ravel up the roll of duct tape recently used to stop fluid leaks back into original format and sell the tape for about half the value of the van.

The van will be carrying Colt Haney, Scott Kausler, Cooper Pierce and A.J. Clark, top-brand guitars and speakers, and a mixing board that shines in glory. The van itself is a mix of Chevy parts from various models and years.

Even though a comparison to Frankenstein can be made, the comparison is weak at best because Frankenstein's monster was strong and fully mobile. The starting procedure suggests the use of two hands. One hand must hold the ignition from its suspended wire located 4 inches down from the dash board and a second hand to input the key. Locking the driver side door requires an intense two-minute training session. Only the sturdiest of passengers, as Cooper will attest, can withstand the rattle and shaking as the van cruises at a top speed of 47 miles per hour.

Two amazing facts related to the classic vehicle are, first, that this weekend it will be the two-year anniversary of the van's reintroduction to the public roadway. And second, the van has a rock music history that extends beyond Colt.45. Two years ago, the van should have been destroyed and salvaged. But, on July 16, 2005 (Colt Haney's birthday), the van was brought out of retirement and spared a near-fatal tow to the junk yard. The half-dead van was forced to struggle on filled with a bunch of young rockers. Instead of a quiet, respectful death below a crusher, the van was sentenced to serve the worst type of

passenger-musicians.

The motivation behind revitalizing the collage of metal on Colt's 16th birthday had nothing to do with its ability to carry large loads, and everything to do with close family ties and music. The story behind the van started with Uncle Larry. Uncle Larry had also toured as a musician with the same van. The guitar legend said recently with great fondness about the van, "I drove it in the desert on a rat rampage which ultimately ended in my divorce."

Because of the van's history, Colt's uncle and music mentor was hesitant about the van's destruction. Uncle Larry did not have it in him to do the dirty deed of dragging the van to the salvage yard. The van was an old sick dog that needed the mercy of a bullet to ease its suffering. Uncle Larry — the same Larry Haney of Sweet Medicine and staff at Marilyn's Music in Baker City — could not manage the bullet himself. Instead of a merciful death, the van was "sold" to his nephew, Colt. And, thanks to the magical and mechanical hands of Hoss Haney, the next generation of Haney rock musicians began to tour in the same van.

The primary issue this weekend with keeping the van in motion is that it will be far from the duct-tape specialists who have administered repairs in the past. Elgin is a long ways out of the way for Hoss Haney to come, especially for the van.

As a precautionary tactic, venue organizer Nancy Crawford at Community Bank in Elgin has begun the process of contingency plan development. She is working with venture hosts, the Elgin Senior Class of 2008, to assure that duct tape will be immediately transferred to any location north of La Grande. Due to her efforts, a team of specially trained EHS seniors and a truck with a pulling capacity will be ready and waiting both days to assist the van along its laborious route. The EHS Senior Class is hosting Colt.45 as a fundraiser for a fun, drug-free and safe graduation night.

The van along with Clark, Kausler, Peirce and Haney will be at the Elgin Community Center Friday and Saturday from 9 p.m. to midnight. Uncle Larry, meanwhile, will be performing with the band members of Sweet Medicine — Al MacLeod and Peggy Dval.

/>

P.S. Happy birthday, Colt, and Uncle Larry says you still owe him for the

van.